Friday, December 30

emode is over

Jason's back from Bacolod. :) I'm happy. :) Nuff said.

Tuesday, December 27

becoming a bum

I woke up at 5:30pm today. I don't know exactly what happened. I went to bed at around 6 am and the next time I opened my eyes, I was buried under a comforter and a flannel blanket and the sky was the exact same color as it was when I went to bed. Not exactly productive.

It gets worse. Upon getting up, I trudged to the next room, flopped down on the bed and proceeded to immerse myself in the cable world. At least I moved, right? Wrong. If there was a cable connection in my mom's room, I wouldn't have gotten up at all.

Pretty soon, I felt my tummy rumbling so I headed downstairs to rummage in our refrigerator. I chanced upon some leftover lengua (yum!) and with my plate piled high, went back upstairs to watch some more TV. I would probably still be in front of the TV now if my uncle hadn't come home and reclaimed his room.

Now I know why I'm getting so tubby. But, what else is there left to do? Jason's away, and has extended his absence until Friday, and all my girlfriends are either away as well or busy with their respective families. *sigh*

Oh well I refuse to continue lying around here doing nothing. Tomorrow I intend to get out, go shopping and pamper myself. Might as well get some "me" time in while everyone's enjoying themselves.

In the meantime, I've been trying to put some order into the chaos on my desk and I keep finding all sorts of interesting things I'd forgotten I had. For instance, during my second year, I must have been bored out of my mind because I found a notebook with lots or random notes written inside. It's fun to read stuff I wrote a while back because I sometimes can't even recognize my own voice. Here's me pondering gender roles. :P

I just remembered something I said yesterday about women becoming the dominating force. I said that whenever a woman lets a guy take control of the situation, he just fucks it up and the women are left to clean up the mess, so it's better just to let us take control from the start. When guys are allowed to dominate women, they go on this macho trip, the woman is seen as a weakling and everything else falls apart. As opposed to when a woman is in control, everything is organized and things are taken care of. But, as with all things, there is a balance to the amount of power a woman should wield. If she's too weak, the man becomes disgusted and goes off to find other women. If she's too dominating, the man still runs off to find someone else. Smart women know how to achieve the balance. You have to let the man think that you're a vulnerable, innocent thing who still needs to be taken care of and let him have his way concerning small, unimportant things. That way, he gets to keep his masculinity. But, you also have to keep him in line. You hold the cards, you call the shots. Just don't let him know it. That way everyone's happy.

I honestly don't know what I was thinking when I wrote this. Must have been during the peak of my feminist days. Anyway, I'm off to bed, again. Let's hope I wake up earlier than 5:30. I'll consider it a triumph if I do.

Monday, December 26

my turn to be emo

Maybe Santa thought I was naughty this year. Or maybe I'm just trying to rationalize my disappointing Christmas. I was trying so hard to be happy today. And I almost succeeded. Despite the fact that Jason's all the way in Bacolod and won't be back until Wednesday, I was still doing pretty well. We went to visit my cousins in Cavite and did all the things we usually do when we go there: play with the kids and eat a lot. But on the way home, my uncle brought up the possibility of us moving to another house and my mood just sort of crumbled.

I've lived in this house all my life (actually at the house next door, but it's the same thing) and I don't want to move away. I love living 15 minutes away from my school. I love that Mini-Stop and Grill Queen is just across the street from us. I love how our house seems to be near everything essential, especially Sikatuna. And most of all, I love that half of my family lives on the other side of the wall. How can I bear moving away from my nana? And who will Dave run to when he gets into a fight with his mom? And when will I ever see Moe?

But at the same time, I have to consider that there are valid reasons for moving out of this house. I just don't want to face them just yet. I guess I should be happy that they at least want to consult with me. At least my opinion has some sort of weight. But I wish the proof of this had come at some other time. I want to be able to act childish and throw a tantrum. But we all learn at some time or another we don't always get what we want. It just so happened that my time came today.

Saturday, December 24

more attempts at compartmentalization

I got the title from Phoebe...heehee... :P yay, more quizzes!

Your Fashion Style is Classic

You like what's stood the test of time...
Simple, well styled clothes that don't scream trendy
You stay updated and modern, but your clothes stay in style for a while
You wouldn't be caught in animal prints, fake fur, or super bright colors
What's Your Fashion Style?


You are a Great Girlfriend

When it comes to your guy, you're very thoughtful
But you also haven't stopped thinking of yourself
You're the perfect blend of independent and caring
You're a total catch - make sure your guy knows it too!
Are You a Good Girlfriend?


You Are Most Like Carrie!

You're quirky, flirty, and every guy's perfect first date.
But can the guy in question live up to your romantic ideal?
It's tough for you to find the right match - you're more than a little picky.
Never fear... You've got a great group of friends and a great closet of clothes, no matter what!


Romantic prediction: You'll fall for someone this year...

Totally different from any guy you've dated.
Which Sex and the City Vixen Are You?
Not such a surprise. I've always identified with Carrie. Her words may as well have come out of my mouth. The prediction's a year late though. :P


You Were Pretty Average This Year

You Were 50% Naughty, 50% Nice

You tried to be a good girl this year...
But as you know, being good isn't that fun!
If you're extra sweet, you may have enough time to get on that nice list.
How Naughty (Or Nice) Were You This Year?


You Have Him Totally Hooked

Your guy is all yours - and happily so.
He loves being around you, and he totally sees you as a couple.
It looks like you two have a great future together - if you want it!
Do You Have Him Hooked?

This, of course, is stating the obvious. He has me hooked too. *goofy smile*

You are Milk Chocolate

A total dreamer, you spend most of your time with your head in the clouds.
You often think of the future, and you are always working toward your ideal life.
Also nostalgic, you rarely forget a meaningful moment... even those from long ago.
What Kind of Chocolate Are You?


You Belong in New York City

You're an energetic, ambitious woman.
And only NYC is fast enough for you.
Maybe you'll set yourself up with a killer career
Or simply take in all the city has to offer.
What City Do You Belong In?


You Are a Natural Beauty!

You're the kind of beauty that every guy dreams about...
One that looks good in the morning - without a stich of makeup
That's doesn't mean you're a total hippie chic though
You have style, but for you, style is effortless
What Type of Beauty Are You?

Last one:

You Have Your PhD in Men

You understand men almost better than anyone.
You accept that guys are very different, and you read signals well.
Work what you know about men, and your relationships will be blissful.
How Well Do You Understand Men?

aiming for a merry christmas

Of course Christmas should be the happiest time of the year. But I notice that as I grow older, Christmas, at least my Christmas, loses more and more of its glitter. Gone are the days when I pestered everyone to break out the Christmas decorations as early as November. I've stopped counting the gifts under the Christmas tree every night and there are no more smiles of contentment at the ever-growing piles of presents. And I've lost that heady mix of intense anticipation and impatience that always used to accompany me on the day before Christmas.

I guess that's the price that comes with growing up. At the age of nineteen, Christmas has become more of a responsibility than a delight. There are the usual responsibilities like shopping for perfect presents for my lengthening list of family and friends, wrapping those presents, cooking dishes for Noche Buena, and juggling the different holiday engagements. Then there are other more tedious responsibilities like law annotations and lit papers that should really have no place in the holiday season. With all these things to keep track of, it's no wonder that the holidays have also been invaded by that dreadful affliction we all wish to avoid: STRESS.

It really is quite disheartening when you consider it. But no matter what, it's still Christmas. Now is the time for all the things that matter the most, like family. So I'm going to confine my complaints to this particular entry, and greet the next two days with as much joy and enthusiasm as I can muster. So Merry Christmas everyone! :)

Monday, December 19

more products of boredom...

Your Summer Ride is a Beetle Convertible

Fun, funky, and a little bit euro.
You love your summers to be full of style and sun!
What's Your Summer Ride?

Haha...I knew it. Baby, I told you. I was meant for this car. Now to find the money to buy it...


Your Eyes Should Be Brown

Your eyes reflect: Depth and wisdom

What's hidden behind your eyes: A tender heart
What Color Should Your Eyes Be?

My eyes are brown.
Gummy Bears

You may be smooshie and taste unnatural, but you're so darn cute.
What Kind of Candy Are You?

Smooshie?! Who the hell wants to be described as smooshie??

Your Hair Should Be Purple

Intense, thoughtful, and unconventional.
You're always philosophizing and inspiring others with your insights.
What's Your Funky Inner Hair Color?


You're a Romantic Kisser

For you, kissing is all about feeling the romance
You love to kiss under the stars or by the sea
The perfect kiss involves the perfect mood
It's pretty common for kisses to sweep you off your feet
What Kind of Kisser Are You?

withdrawal is a bitch

No I'm not taking drugs. Neither am I an alcoholic. I'm talking about an entirely different addiction. Cable. After almost ten years, we are without it. Basically, what it boils down to is I'm bored. Suddenly there's this huge gap in my schedule and I have no way of filling it.

Oh sure I know how shallow this sounds. Other people have to go without food or shelter and I'm sitting here whining about the fact that I can't watch my favorite TV shows. The thing is, I don't care. No way am I going to watch that crap they churn out on local television. (To the people who actually watch that crap, pardon me, one person's crap is another person's riveting crap) I'm going to sit here and whine until someone gives in and gives me back my cable. Until then, I'll just have to make do with other substandard ways of killing time.

Like these:


Your Heart Is Green
Love completes you, but that doesn't mean you seek it out.When love comes your way, you integrate it peacefully into the rest of you life.
Your flirting style: Laid back
Your lucky first date: Walking around aimlessly and talking
Your dream lover: Is both enthusiastic and calm
What you bring to relationships: Balance

What Color Heart Do You Have?

Ahh...so true. Apparently my green heart works well for me. :D


You Are a Little Scary
You've got a nice edge to you. Use it.

How Scary Are You?



You Should Get a MBA (Masters of Business Administration)
You're a self starter with a drive for success.You'd make a great entrepreneur.

What Advanced Degree Should You Get?
Who knew I'd get validation from an online quiz. :P Now I know I'm on the right path. Hahaha...

Your Seduction Style: Au Natural
You rank up there with your seduction skills, though you might not know it.That's because you're a natural at seduction. You don't realize your power!The root of your natural seduction power: your innocence and optimism.
You're the type of person who happily plays around and creates a unique little world.Little do you know that your personal paradise is so appealing that it sucks people in.You find joy in everything - so is it any surprise that people find joy in you?
You bring back the inner child in everyone you meet with your sincere and spontaneous ways.Your childlike (but not childish) behavior also inspires others to care for you.As a result, those who you befriend and date tend to be incredibly loyal to you.

What Kind of Seducer Are You?



You Are Mud Pie
You're the perfect combo of flavor and depth. Those who like you give into their impulses.

What Kind of Pie Are You?
---
On another note, today, or rather yesterday, seeing as its 3 am, marks the NINTH MONTH with my super adorable, loving, sweet, charming, witty, lovable, hunky, and absolutely wonderful boyfriend. I love you darling. :)